Inspired by a theme in both my personal and professional life at the moment….
(From my other blog/online hang out space Bridget Jane’s Health Diary )
So something I have really been observing of late, both within myself AND of course with my clients, is the whole notion of how what we BELIEVE affects us, or more accurately, determines our WHOLE experience of ourselves, the world and others.
Yes, our beliefs truly do create reality. Our reality. Our experience of each and every day.
You may want to challenge this one, and PLEASE do, but I am confident that with testing you too will come to the conclusion that this premise is indeed sound.
And so, it is from these observations that I have come to the conclusion that our beliefs ARE EVERYTHING….
And of course, at the same time, they are NOTHING…
How the hell can I be saying that OPPOSITE truths are both correct?
Bear with me…. I will get there 🙂
It all depends on the CONTEXT and in WHO’s world we are talking….
Yes, another paradox right there! Although there is arguably ONE world….there is also arguably approximately 7 BILLION worlds in existence….
Each person lives in a world of their own. Every moment since birth, and perhaps even prior to that, has shaped the way a given person sees, experiences and interacts with the world.
That is why NO ONE absolute world exists….Why there is no absolute right or wrong, good or bad…. It is ALL relative, and depends ENTIRELY on your conditioning.
Conditioning is a fancy term for all the experiences you’ve had that have shaped you somehow, and thus lead to the creation of your unique beliefs.
A few examples are:
– You’re dad left when you were 5, so you may believe that “all men will abandon you”….
– You saw your mum work REALLY hard to earn money and support you so you form the belief that you “must work hard to earn money and survive”…
– Whenever you were sad, you’re nan brought you scones with jam and cream, so now these are your “go to” comfort food whenever anything goes wrong….
– Your house burned down when you were 3 and you stood there watching everyone else do something, yet you felt helpless and couldn’t do anything so you believe to this day that you are “useless and lazy and somehow at fault”…
There are SO many examples of these, they are ENDLESS….
And even though LOGICALLY and CONSCIOUSLY we may recognise that these are false ideas or perceptions, as a human being, as much as 97% of all we THINK, SAY and DO is driven by our SUB-CONSCIOUS….
Yes that’s right….
Only 3-10% of ALL that we think, say and do in a given day or moment is governed by what’s going on in the background…. Our CONDITIONING…. Our BELIEFS….
And some of this works really well for us 🙂 They are beliefs that serve and support helpful thoughts, behaviours and actions.
Yet the reality is many of these are INCREDIBLY UNHELPFUL ideas that not only LIMIT our thinking, actions and entire world, but can actively DAMAGE all of these aspects of our life….
That is why a CONSCIOUSLY reflective life is JUST SO IMPORTANT….
Can you imagine if 3, 4, 5, 6 or 7 year old you was walking around in your body, running your life on a day to day basis…???
Well THIS is EXACTLY what can (and DOES!) happen when we choose to live a life on auto-pilot, never questioning or evaluating how what we are thinking, saying or doing is affecting the outcomes we are experiencing as “reality”….
A LOT of the work I do with clients is about this process…
Learning to look at ourselves differently…. Taking a massive step back from, or flight way UP ABOVE, ourselves to see from an outsiders perspective how WHAT we are experiencing is actually coming about and playing out….
How decisions we made WAY BACK WHEN we were 3, 5 or 7 are at the CORE of unhelpful patterns we play out OVER AND OVER like a broken record so all we feel is frustrated, angry and RESIGNED to or at the way things are….the way WE are…
We give up on ourselves, AND on our dreams, and despairingly conclude this is HOW IT IS….How WE are…
I have been at this point SO many times, and even now I experience this journey…
And the most HELPFUL thing I can do it this time is learn to look at myself with CLEAR, COMPASSIONATE, LOVING and NON-JUDGEMENTAL eyes….
To HEAR myself….
That scared, upset, LITTLE part of myself that has, in her head, a LEGITIMATE reason for having the (irrational, crazy, non-sensical) ideas and beliefs that she does….
Journalling will often uncover these blockages and battles for me…. And so too does open, uncensored discussion with someone I trust, who loves me unconditionally and can give me some helpful, honest feedback…. And of course, coaching and processes designed specifically to unveil and unravel these psyche-programs are INVALUABLE….
Coaching and self-awareness work is ABSOLUTELY an essential part of my life that has shaped who I am 🙂
The more I do, the more insight, courage, love and compassion I have to just BE MYSELF 🙂 It is so so liberating and WHY I am SO PASSIONATE about and IN LOVE with the work I do 🙂
Because THIS WORK is what I get to do EVERYDAY…
And this GIFT of self-awareness, understanding and LOVE is what I get to SHARE with amazing souls EVERYDAY 🙂
So….I say to you….
Your beliefs are nothing but your OWN ideas and decisions about how THINGS, YOURSELF, OTHERS and THE WORLD is….
They MAY be true and real, and they MAY NOT….
The ANSWER is to ongoingly work out if what you are carrying around and projecting as GOSPEL each and every day, is actually working FOR YOU, or AGAINST you, and to re-evaluate, question and EXPLORE what is NOT working for you, and in fact KEEPING YOU NOTHING BUT STUCK….
I hope today’s discussion has delivered some valuable insights and options to you…
If you would like to experience what it is like to feel CLEARER, LIGHTER, HAPPIER and at PEACE with what is going on within you, please be in touch 🙂
I now offer one-off DISCOVERY SESSIONS which are intended for JUST that purpose 🙂
You can email me on [email protected] to set up a time 🙂
All my love,
Holistic Mind, Body, Soul Health Practitioner
Accredited Practicing Dietitian